"इश्क बेदर्दी म्जुह को पता है ..इसकी चाहत में मिलती सजा है .... बेकारी में मरर ही न जाऊं ..... ना समाज को में कैसे समजाऊ “All this is now just a part of entertainment and love is only found in history ..." आज कल टाइम किसके पास है प्यार करनेका ... मुझे तो मस्त एकदम टिकाव & show piece type Wife चाहिए ...." This is what I hear from some of the prospective grooms in my latest profession. For me this is a complete different experience. I have convinced people to buy investment, to pay off their liabilities but never convinced anyone to get married. It sounds amusing but this is one of the most interesting profile I have ever come a crossed. First day , when I was new to this world of matrimony I thought after selling the most toughest product like Insurance this will be a cake walk , but , I confess today , that was a wrong perception I had . Because, here it’s emotional selling. These people have everything in their life except spouse & to some extent they are solely responsible for their loneliness. They spend most of their time behind their career and had paid least or no attention towards their personal life when it was required and now blame all possible events, person etc for their late marriage. Trust me , within these 6 months I have met so many "Shaadi Pagal " ( yes , I call them shaadi pagal ) people that now if some one comes to me within 15 minutes like a doctor I can analyze the reason why is it getting delayed and prescribe him some tonics (read tonic as necessary changes that needs to be done in his personality ) so that he/she can get married ASAP . No intention to boost myself but this is the fact and this is actually what I have learned in my latest job. Most amazing fact that I have learnt is there is nothing like Arrange marriage or Love marriage, infact, there is a new concept developed "Wise marriage”. A pure balance sheet is prepared and people analyze where there is profit and where there is a loss .
1st example, If 1 girl is pursuing her Post Graduation or if she can be a decent home maker in future and 2nd is already a Post graduate then go for 2nd one. "Income flow will be much faster!!! Think positive.... मेरी home loan है यार.... If she will start giving output soon it will be easier & 2nd thing , if I am getting a readymade Post graduate girl why should I waste money and time behind the one who is still pursuing , may be she will change her mind in future and I will have to bare the loss . They have a beautiful definition for home makers and that is " the one who helps me to make my home (read financially) "....Caste जाने दो यार .... Hardly matters , Its high time now I need to settle down in Mumbai . I am 27. "
We literally pity such kind of people. I really respect those people who value education, the one who values females and treat them equal, trust me a female never has any objections to support her better half financially during bad times and there are lacs of females doing this right now and as per the growing inflation rate the number of working females will increase day by day, but, what irritates most is greediness. If you want her to do all this for you, respect her views, respect her decisions, give her some space, allow her to decide on her career, give her the liberty to take the decision weather she would like to work for her entire life or only till the crucial period. Don t judge her only on the basis of her degrees. There are lacs of females earning more than 50K on basis of only Graduation and that to at very respectable positions. There are various fields & Sectors like Sales, BPO (not only voice process, remember BPO is a huge Industry and has various process), to some extent in banking and financial sector too and many more decent jobs .There are people who do not accept self - employed females, for obvious reasons. But people do not wish to think so much. They just want lucrative degrees and handsome salary from their wives so that liabilities could be paid off easily. These kinds of people actually deserve fantastic professional life, truly they are excellent professional, but, as far as their personal life is concerned...... "Its better I don t say anything”. But, here I will not blame only boys, there are females too who force guys to think in this manner. Over ambitious girls , one who gives priority only to their career will love such kind of guys because they do not like joint families , they feel taking this financial burden is easy rather then taking the burden of In laws .
2nd example, beauty , how can one forget this as this is one of the most ancient and most ever green requirement in matrimony purpose , but , here I saw various colours in this requirement . I have one customer, well qualified, one of the most reputed businessman (would not like to name here) in their community, very rich family. But they had a very wired requirement , location no bar , caste no bar , no issues with education ( under graduate is also fine , even though his son is an MBA ) , financial status is not required a middle class girl will also do or someone even lower , nothing matters only one thing matters "Beauty " , she should have sharp features , that’s it , and most important guy does not have any say in this . Its family who decides , yeah , show off will be all done , they will sit for a meeting together and discuss all relevant and irrelevant topics but that will be least considered , "Vidhi उसको क्या पता चलेगा , वोह तो बच्चा है ... " . I said, " yes Uncle , 28 yrs का बच्चा ही तो हुआ " (obviously in my mind ). I have lacs of such high class people's profile who run blindly behind beauty . This is life ....thats it . They feel they are rich they can get best of the best , and as per their definition beauty is the only quality , nothing else is required .
3rd example, these are simply called " sample piece " , because they themselves don t know what they want from their own life , forget expectations from spouse . Sometimes they themselves are so confused about themselves they don t know what exactly they are searching . Initially they register saying they are very strict about their caste , show themselves as very decent and sophisticated people . But , within few days we come to know that its all show off , they are so frustrated and fed up with their own lives that they are fine with anybody and everybody but not a single person on this planet is ready to marry them . The reason is their nature, that’s it . They have this non adjustable, suspicious nature, false ego, etc etc . These kind of people who go for Personalized services, because , here they feel they have hired someone who will be responsible if they do not get married , because , otherwise there is no one who takes their non sense but here they feel they can speak in any weird way just because they have paid . Once, my customer was rejected due to the reasons mentioned above and the reason she said is “There is a fault in my relationship manager, a relationship manager should always be a psychologist . she should have selected a guy for me , she does not understand the process of marriage as she is just 23 ( commonly said by people who get no other reason to blame the company , relationship manager is too young ), if she would have selected a right candidate I would have not wasted my time " . I felt like saying " Sure madam , from last 36 years you are wasting your time because of me , right ? , U don t know about your caste as your parents are both from different caste and you don t understand either of culture , but still you expect a person who belongs from your native , how intelligent , isn't it ? one more thing , at this age also you feel you will not be comfortable staying with in laws and you dont hesitate to speak all this in front of the prospective groom and still you feel someone will accept you and will welcome you ? , I think madam you need to decide who actually needs a psychologist. "
Some also say , I got rejected because of this relationship manager , she does not have effective communication skills and must have failed to explain my profile to the prospective groom , agreed madam , I said , your extra ordinary profile does not allow me to use my communication skills , your pics with micro mini shorts and tight t shirts and the stylish way you have mentioned in your profile that you enjoy partying till late night , its still my fault that i did not convince the person to marry you . You are absolutely right madam . At the age of 30 also you are so enthusiastic and energetic . I still remember the way she said "what's wrong with my pics ? People are very modern now a days everyone wants an extra ordinary beautiful girl , and thats what I am . " I salute your confidence madam , what else I can say ?
But , If I add all this and If I don t add those excellent people in this post it will be very unfair , yes , there are some pure and true souls also , the one whose marriage genuinely get delay either due to social responsibility , some unavoidable circumstances in family or some other reasons , but , they are real gem of a person and we as a part of matrimony team actually wish that they get best of the best person and live an excellent life after their marriage because they actually deserve nothing else but the best in this world . I have seen old parents coming to my center and genuinely worried about their children , they trust us , we feel satisfied when we help them and this builds trust , love and respect for each other. There are cases where we personally give guarantee about the girl / boy only after seeing such kind of decent people . What these people need is just a shoulder to rely upon , and we as a team feel its a pleasure to cater such kind of true souls , it is more then just a job , its humanity . Just because of such kind souls I feel satisfied at the end of the day , their smiles and lovely blessings that they shower on me motivates me to work for them .
Lastly , no negative feelings for any one , its after all their own lives and may god give the best of the best to everyone .
